In Her Purse: Amy Shoenthal
The Setback Cycle, snacks, and so much lip gloss.
Mercury might not go into retrograde until April 1, but I’ve had a little black cloud over my head this week. Everything just feels a little off, and I’m trying not to think about the fact that the first quarter of 2024 is done and dusted, and I’m not entirely sure what I have to show for myself. Where did the first three months of 2024 go, and what the heck have I been doing with my time?!
Do you ever look around and feel like everyone else is getting so much more done than you? That’s me this week. I feel like a slacker who just wants to spend all her time watching The New Look on Apple TV and nothing else. But we all know that’s not really an option, and so we soldier on!
Of course, it’s not all bad—there’s so much good when I remember to look around. Joni Mitchell is back on Spotify. A friend graciously jumped in to save the day on a project. We spent Monday after school dyeing Easter eggs. New York City is just about to burst into bloom, and the warmer, longer days offer so much promise. And have I mentioned lately that I am very grateful for The Purse readers and the little community we are growing here? I really am.
I’m switching my publishing schedule up a tiny bit these next two weeks because we hit a little snafu with the next edition of DIVISION OF LABOR. So look for that next week. This week we have a new IN HER PURSE from the very cool (and very well connected) Amy Shoenthal. It’s good timing, though, because Amy’s debut book, The Setback Cycle: How Defining Moments Can Move Us Forward, launched last week. And it also feels appropriate that I run her interview on a week when I myself have faced a small setback. It’s all about how you respond to it! Right? Right!
I met Amy last year after two different friends (hi, Cate and Cristina) suggested I meet her. I’m still not entirely sure how we hadn’t met before because it feels like we know all the same people, and we’re both members of Luminary. But I was very glad for the intro. Amy is smart and funny, and she writes a great newsletter and always seems to be interviewing the most interesting women for Forbes.
As I was putting together the list of women I wanted to feature for this series, Amy was at the top, especially with her book coming out. And so I’ll let her take it from here!
The Questions
1. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
That’s a big question! When I visualize “perfect happiness,” I picture myself with my family and close friends/their families all together on a beach vacation, me in a chair under an umbrella, reading an amazing book or writing my next book. There’s a spa somewhere nearby. And access to reliable babysitters so the parents can enjoy the spa (or water sports/indulgent activity of their choosing).
2. What is your greatest money fear?
My fear is that all the money we’ve so carefully saved will vanish.
I’ve learned that nothing is permanent, so even in moments throughout my life where I have been lucky enough to feel financially comfortable, I’m aware that the situation might be fleeting. I’ve experienced the financial impact of sudden and unexpected layoffs as both a child and an adult, so I know not to get too comfortable.
3. What is the financial trait you most deplore in yourself?
I take too many Ubers and Lyfts when I should be taking the subway.
4. What is the financial trait you most deplore in others?
People who are showy about their money while being stingy with tipping or rude to service workers. I realize this is so specific, but you absolutely know what I mean, and you’re probably picturing someone you know right now.
5. If you could change one thing about your financial situation, what would it be?
I’ll take one hundred billion dollars, please.
6. What do you consider your greatest financial achievement?
Mainly the fact that I have been financially independent my entire adult life. I take a lot of pride in the fact that I have been financially self-sufficient since my early 20s. I wasn’t one of those young working adults relying on my parents to support me, even though my first job out of college paid a salary of $26,000 a year. I moved into tiny apartments (ask me about the one-bedroom we turned into a three-bedroom and lived in for five years), always paid my own rent, and was never on my family cell phone plan over the age of 21. No shade to anyone who does have help. If you have the option, please take it and enjoy it!
I’m also proud that I was able to pay off my student loans and avoid going into credit card debt. I’ve also been maxing out my 401(k) since I was 22, even while earning that teeny tiny income.
7. Where would you most like to live?
Sunnyside, Queens, where I currently live is pretty cool, but if we’re dreaming big, I’ll take a second home on the beach that’s big enough to accommodate lots of guests (see my answer to question 1) and a third home in the mountains.
8. What is your most treasured possession?
My grandmother’s ring and my grandfather’s dog tags from WWII.
9. What is your greatest money regret?
Charging way less than I should have for my marketing consulting services when I first started freelancing years ago. Not negotiating harder in so many circumstances throughout my career.
10. What is your money motto?
Your financial situation could change at any moment, so enjoy what you have but always maintain a solid safety net.
11. Tell us about one charity/nonprofit/cause you support that you’d like The Purse readers to know about:
A nonprofit that is dear to my heart is She’s the First, an organization that focuses on ensuring girls around the world have access to education. I’ve worked with She’s the First in volunteer and advisory roles for the past decade, and in many ways, it feels like I’ve grown up with them. In a very full circle moment, The Setback Cycle's publisher, Regalo Press, is merging publishing with philanthropy, so they are actually making a donation to She’s the First in honor of the book's publication. It made the most sense to choose them as The Setback Cycle’s nonprofit partner, not only because of my personal connection but because when we educate more girls, we are essentially creating more future women leaders like the ones profiled in the book.
The Purse
I’m shameless, so of course I keep a copy of my book with me at all times.
I also carry around bookmarks to give out to people. They say “What’s your next chapter?” On the back there’s a QR code that directs folks to learn more about The Setback Cycle.
I also have a bookmark that Nicole Haroutunian gave me for her book Choose This Now. She’s a local writer whom I recently had coffee with.
Gum, tissues, and an iPhone charger—all the essentials.
Sunglasses, even in winter.
Snacks, always.
Swag (pens and a notebook) from a recent speaking engagement I did at Google.
Deodorant, a must.
Front-desk tags from recent client meetings that I will now throw out, but I wanted to keep it real for this photo shoot.
Stress relief CBD drops. See above about running all over the city.
Mini hand lotions.
Hair clip and hair ties.
A random hotel key that I forgot to return.
A coupon for Black Seed Bagels. Woohoo!
Various hand sanitizers.
Sticky notes from a University of Maryland alumni event. (Go Terps!)
A day pass to Luminary.
I have an unnecessary number of lip glosses stuffed into various pockets all over my backpack that I wasn’t aware I had until I did this shoot.
Knomo backpack. This backpack has lasted five years, and I just love it. It’s slim, it fits my laptop along with all these other miscellaneous items, and since I generally spend my days running all over Manhattan from client meetings to events, I am really grateful for the back support.
Thank you so much, Amy!
And this is the perfect segue to mention the WIN Summit, where Amy and I will both be speaking on Thursday, May 30. The focus of WIN is to enhance women’s leadership through the art of negotiation. The event involves a combination of experiential workshops, thought-provoking panel discussions, inspiring keynotes, a one-on-one coaching corner, an interactive exhibitor hall, and many networking and wellness moments. It should be an amazing day!
Right now (through March 31), you can receive 50% off your ticket to WIN Summit in honor of Women's History Month. Use the promo code PowerOfWomen50 to take advantage of this limited-time offer. (There are also some opportunities for sponsorship—if you’re interested, please reach out.)
(I’ll note that I know these tickets are expensive, and if you feel frustrated about the barrier to entry, please know that I try to participate—and promote—in all kinds of different events at all different price points. So please keep reading The Purse, and I’ll make sure to alert everyone to cool opportunities and conferences that cross my radar!)
And that’s a wrap on today’s newsletter! I hope everyone has a great week!
xx
Lindsey
"What is the financial trait you most deplore in others?" - ooh this one is so juicy and I am here for it. I love Amy's answer to it too!
Can you share what year the $26K was? That’s a significant detail!