Thank you so much, Lindsey, for your thoughtful writing.
As a state university employee, I value the salary transparency available through state salary registries; however, I've found that my salary is consistently underreported on those sites, leading me to wonder if others' salaries are also deflated. It can also be jarring to see that my supervisor makes nearly $100,000 more than me, and her supervisor makes another $100,000 more than that. It’s true that the expectations demanded of their positions are certainly much greater than that of my own, so I don’t begrudge their salaries. It’s just interesting to know how much they make. When I’m having a more frustrated moment it can be easy to unjustly think, “Is their work worth that much?” (Not that I could do what they do ;)
Salary transparency can also be tricky when other factors come into play. In my office, we are a mix of customer service geared employees and "knowledge workers" (My apologies to Cal Newport, but I kind of hate that term because everyone uses knowledge to successfully complete their work). Not only is there a wide salary gap between people sitting mere feet apart, but there is also a difference between those who can work remotely and those who must be in their seats all day Monday through Friday. I understand that these differences are the result of pay scales that exist across the University, which often have different education requirements; however, it can make for uncomfortable moments when some individuals, myself included, work remotely and/or have flexible schedules, while also enjoying nearly double the salary of others. There can be a feeling of wanting to prove how hard I’m working, potentially in part because my work is not as obvious as the work of my peers, whose work is more robust quantitatively, and who have a systematic audit trail for their administrative work. Having recently hired two employees, it was also difficult to not be able to negotiate within a tight pay schedule. I applauded one employee’s effort to negotiate--this is especially important in an environment where consistent cost of living adjustments can grow one’s salary overtime and salary transparency makes one's starting salary important when later transitioning to different roles within the University--but in the end, I had nowhere to go. It can also be demoralizing to employees when they know that for their specific role, the salary is and will remain what it is.
On a completely separate note, what are your thoughts on salary transparency with children? My two kids are 7 and 10 and as a family we often talk about spending and saving money, and how to make money decisions in general. When they ask how much I make, I’m hesitant to respond. I don’t want them to tell their friends (their school has some very well-off families and some families who struggle financially), and I’m not sure if they would have any concept of what the amount actually means. Sure, it sounds like a big number if you have no idea what retirement, mortgages, and childcare actually cost. We live so frugally that sometimes I worry they think we are not doing well financially, when in reality we have significant investments. On the other hand, I want my daughter, especially, to feel empowered to grow her career and be proud of her earnings. Would love to hear your thoughts!
Laura, I love this comment so much! Thank you for sharing your experience working in an office where salaries are essentially transparent and there are salary bands. It's tough! Your insights are really helpful!
As for kids, oof, this is a good one that I haven't figured out, but plan to write about in the future! I haven't told my son how much I make, but like your kids, he's definitely curious!
Laura - I'm a government employee as well, and have had my salary public for many years. It does make for a weird scenario. When my now husband and I started dating, we both were public sector and knew what each other made (I made more) and it was just a weird undercurrent. I'm in the finance area of my organization, and in some ways it has wrecked havoc on our salary bands, cause you can see what the competition is paying at other agencies. It feels like an arms race, with no end in sight (which could be great for workers! But also we can't all keep up with that, as the government as a whole hasn't been treating it uniformly).
Kids - when I was in high school, my parents had me pay the bills for one month. It helped to see what electricity, the mortgage, a car payment, etc. cost. Doesn't help with the bigger question how much do you make. But it was an eye opener on where the money goes.
I did the same with my kids at one point. I made them sit down with the checkbook and bills and take care of everything -- I signed the checks but they did the rest. Of course, nobody pays bills with checkbooks now, but I still think it was worthwhile to do.
Another fantastic piece (with classic Lindsey comments throughout!). I do talk about finances with my husband, friends, and other loved ones. But, that's a more recent thing. Early in my career, I felt pressure to 'name a salary' and in doing so (without a ton of pay transparency around at that time), I undersold myself. I wish back then I'd had exposure to pay transparency so I could ensure I was paid a better, more fair rate. I'm so glad this topic is getting much more traction and we're keeping it going. Thanks, Lindsey!
Thanks for the post. Aside from my manager/HR, only two people know how much I earn: my partner, and my financial advisor/tax preparer. And I'm not thrilled that my financial guy has that info, to be honest!
I'm all for employees having the right to share their salaries with each other, but I also think employees and employers in the private sector should have the right to keep that information private. I also think it's important to have different pay standards/philosophies for the private sector vs. public sector, and certainly for all the very different types of labor that exist.
In many professional occupations, performance/productivity is inevitably somewhat subjective, and at least for jobs involving managerial/"soft" skills, employers need to be able to apply subjective assessments and vary compensation accordingly, even within "peer" groups. People often think that fairness requires "equity", particularly where compensation is concerned. That's a valid view, but in many cases, not a particularly useful or realistic one, I don't think.
Thanks for sharing your perspective! And I appreciate you feeling weird about your financial guy knowing your salary info! :)
I agree with you that many professional occupations involve a lot of skills that are subjective and that makes salary bands difficult to implement. (The work of a manager can be so hard to define!) And there's plenty of examples of where policies rolled out in the name of "equity" end up working against women, because they work fewer hours b/c of caregiving responsibilities, take on different kinds of roles, etc.
But this is why I think this topic is so fascinating -- because there isn't an easy fix, and everyone has a different and valid opinion!
Only tangentially related, but I have to say that one of my greatest professional pleasures in a past life as a hiring manager for junior-level executives was when I was able to offer a starting salary that was higher than what the recruit had been expecting. Even twenty-somethings were often cynical enough to expect that any company would low-ball them if they got the chance, so there was nothing better than to hear someone say something like, "Well, I'm making $20K, but am really looking for $25K" (did I mention this was another lifetime?) and to be able to say "Well, we start at $27K!". :)
Yes! That is the best! And also, it's so nice of you for actually offering more. I've heard stories of companies going with the low-ball offer even if they had more in the budget.
An interesting piece Lindsey. I encourage your subscribers to get a good sense of the literature on gender differentials. Blau, Francine D., and Lawrence M. Kahn. 2017. "The Gender Wage Gap: Extent, Trends, and Explanations." Journal of Economic Literature, 55 (3): 789-865. DOI: 10.1257/jel.20160995
This was a great piece! Being open with my colleagues about my salary has led to raises at 2 of the 3 startups I’ve worked at (the 3rd was so small that I had no counterparts). Startups are notorious for paying very different salaries for people in similar roles because there’s no career leveling system set up yet. But yes it’s so hard to talk about salaries, I’ve usually waited until at least a few months into a job and I’ve gotten to know coworkers better outside of work before talking about it
This is an anomaly, but in the world of Manhattan co-ops, when you apply to the co-op board, you are required to divulge everything about your finances: salary, assets and liabilities, and tax returns for the past two years. And that's not just for co-ops that are stratospherically priced, but can be for relatively modest one bedrooms and studio apartments. It's ridiculous, but those are the rules.
Our first apt in Brooklyn was a coop, and it was crazy how much we had to share in the process! And then you know there are people in the building who know alllll your info!
I think it's fair for them to ask for that information: They're inviting you to be co-owners of the building. What gets me is that buyers go in knowing NOTHING about your co-owners' personal finances! I lived in a small 10-unit co-op years ago and it turned out that two of the units' owners were unemployed and then ended up in arrears on their maintenance, which caused a whole cascade of problems for all the owners, including the fact that banks would no longer lend to prospective buyers.
We definitely need salary transparency! When I was growing up, my parents worked for a state university, so their salaries were public. That's how my mother found out she was making less than the men in her department and got her salary adjusted (in the 1970s). It's tough, though, because salaries are so inequitable. I used to make much more than many of my friends, when I worked in tech; now, as a clean-energy communications consultant, I make much less. We all work hard, but even in my friend group salaries are all over the place.
Why would you care? I will tell anyone who wants to know that the most I ever made was $40K per year, which I made as editor of a daily newspaper and also at an advertising agency. I make far less as a freelancer. It goes up and down a lot now.
Stop thinking your salary says anything about your worth. It doesn’t.
Great article, and such an important topic. Something which went unsaid is that federal law (the NLRA) protects all employees’ right to disclose their salary to one another voluntarily. It’s a different side of this issue than the newer laws that require employer disclosure of employee salaries. I think this is an important right that not enough people know about; maybe more people would be empowered to be transparent if they knew they could not legally suffer any repercussions from being transparent about how much they make.
Oh yes! THANK YOU! I kept meaning to include that in the piece and completely forgot!
And I've definitely had experiences (esp when I was the MD editor) where women have been told they aren't allowed to share their salaries, and we have to remind them of these protections.
I recently shared a detailed budget (on the messy therapist) of what it costs to operate a small private practice as a therapist. However, I left out what I save and what I net from this small business, that I in fact run all by myself. Something felt icky about sharing the exact number. I’m not sure if it came from worrying that I was making too much or that I wasn’t paying myself enough. Lots to think about here.
I also despise this "holiday" and greatly appreciated this piece. My current job at a non profit is the first time I've known my boss' salary in any job. I think being more transparent about salary bands and what employees make would be extremely helpful. As a hiring manager we give a 10k range and I always offer lower or in the middle but expect people to negotiate! We're very honest that we have pay bands so you have to dall within the listed range. It makes hiring easier tbh. As for family and friends it's been blowing my mind that my close girl friends won't even share their salaries! Even something as vague as "in the range of 100k" or "80ish". I try to model the transparency and get nothing in return
thanks for a a thoughtful piece Lindsey! I'm excited for the day when PepTalkHer is out of business thanks to the eventual closing of the pay gap once and for all! Also delighted to see the Peptalk worked and you have a paid tier now - folks are lucky to hear your thoughts weekly and excited to see the support you receive from the community :)
I am completely comfortable sharing my own salary info. I like to challenge people, honestly, because I make SO much less than people assume, and always have. My top salary ever was $40K, and I had to work around 60 hours per week to get it. I was laid off from that job (editor of a daily newspaper) years ago, and it turns out the job market is brutal for 50-ish former community newspaper editors, so I'm doing my own thing with Substack, Medium, books and freelance work. The only thing that keeps me from doing your challenge is my fear that my husband's employer might not welcome total transparency. For most of our marriage, I was the main breadwinner and now he is, but beyond that I probably should not share details. I will say that I recently had one month in which I did out-earn him, and we were both thrilled! He's my biggest cheerleader and truly believes I will someday make a decent amount of money as a writer. I doubt he's correct, but it's nice to be believed in.
Salary transparency can be so tricky and that’s why it’s been taboo so long. But more sharing can help, especially for underrepresented groups. With more information, we can learn more about what is a fair market salary for roles and help close that pay gap.
Very interesting read. Thanks! Just a couple of thoughts I had while reading...
1.NFL football free agency is happening right now, and it is an industry where each player has a contract, and all of them are publicly disclosed. It appears to foster more competition among employers and allow players to have a starting point for negotiating their initial value to their company (team). There are the occasional public mentions of disgruntled players who feel they are underpaid because they outperformed their contact. Of course, they have salary caps, scales, and minimums, as well as limited physical durability that contribute to those feelings. So, it isn't apples-to-apples, but I thought worth a tangential mention.
2.I have never been happier than I am right now in my commission sales job. I feel like I have direct control of my pay, and can create my own best mix of personal quality time and grindstone work to get the best pay and least stress for my tolerances. In fact, that control has led me to turn down multiple "promotion" offers that would have me in salaried positions within my company at higher rates than my current earnings level. I am able to put my own value onto my personal time and factor it in as "income".
3. Regarding parenting, we have such varying styles and philosophies within multi-factor home dynamics that any advice needs to viewed through the unique situational lens. One thing I noticed is that as tired parents my wife and I tend to view chores that are more difficult for us or take more energy for us to perform as higher value chores. Personally, I always required my kids to do household operational chores like dishes, trash, and pet care as bartered requirements in exchange for room and board. Another requirement was to clean up your own messes as you go. I only paid cash for something beyond the scope of normal household chores, like helping me in the yard after a storm, spring cleaning, or irregular tasks. For those things I always offered an amount to my kids but encouraged them to negotiate if they felt like the job was worth more, either before doing it or immediately after to set the expectation for the next time. Of course, I was a single father for a few years and after remarrying, had 6 kids in the household. Both of these factors demand more contribution from the kids, and in retrospect, I believe has made them more responsible and more comfortable going after what their work is worth. This is not a catch-all application for every parent, by any means, but maybe a different perspective for someone to find useful. Growing up in an all-female household has shaped my parenting and my desire to get what I'm worth, too.
You made a lot of great points here. For me, salary transparency is a non-negotiable. Transparency should be here. However, that doesn’t mean I need to know exactly how much the person sitting next to me makes!
I worked at a company that I think did the best at it — they shared salary ranges with employees before it was “cool.” You know if you were at the top of the range, middle, or bottom. You knew how much room you had to grow.
I think in a perfect world, anonymized salary data would be available to all employees, like something of a scatter graph. You’d be able to know where you stand in your peer group. Not only does this support equity goals for women and people of color, but it forces managers to be better at managing their team. If you’re at the bottom, they need to be able to tell you why. Is it your performance? You should know. Too many managers don’t address performance, or worse, don’t fairly tie performance to compensation. This addresses both.
Thank you so much, Lindsey, for your thoughtful writing.
As a state university employee, I value the salary transparency available through state salary registries; however, I've found that my salary is consistently underreported on those sites, leading me to wonder if others' salaries are also deflated. It can also be jarring to see that my supervisor makes nearly $100,000 more than me, and her supervisor makes another $100,000 more than that. It’s true that the expectations demanded of their positions are certainly much greater than that of my own, so I don’t begrudge their salaries. It’s just interesting to know how much they make. When I’m having a more frustrated moment it can be easy to unjustly think, “Is their work worth that much?” (Not that I could do what they do ;)
Salary transparency can also be tricky when other factors come into play. In my office, we are a mix of customer service geared employees and "knowledge workers" (My apologies to Cal Newport, but I kind of hate that term because everyone uses knowledge to successfully complete their work). Not only is there a wide salary gap between people sitting mere feet apart, but there is also a difference between those who can work remotely and those who must be in their seats all day Monday through Friday. I understand that these differences are the result of pay scales that exist across the University, which often have different education requirements; however, it can make for uncomfortable moments when some individuals, myself included, work remotely and/or have flexible schedules, while also enjoying nearly double the salary of others. There can be a feeling of wanting to prove how hard I’m working, potentially in part because my work is not as obvious as the work of my peers, whose work is more robust quantitatively, and who have a systematic audit trail for their administrative work. Having recently hired two employees, it was also difficult to not be able to negotiate within a tight pay schedule. I applauded one employee’s effort to negotiate--this is especially important in an environment where consistent cost of living adjustments can grow one’s salary overtime and salary transparency makes one's starting salary important when later transitioning to different roles within the University--but in the end, I had nowhere to go. It can also be demoralizing to employees when they know that for their specific role, the salary is and will remain what it is.
On a completely separate note, what are your thoughts on salary transparency with children? My two kids are 7 and 10 and as a family we often talk about spending and saving money, and how to make money decisions in general. When they ask how much I make, I’m hesitant to respond. I don’t want them to tell their friends (their school has some very well-off families and some families who struggle financially), and I’m not sure if they would have any concept of what the amount actually means. Sure, it sounds like a big number if you have no idea what retirement, mortgages, and childcare actually cost. We live so frugally that sometimes I worry they think we are not doing well financially, when in reality we have significant investments. On the other hand, I want my daughter, especially, to feel empowered to grow her career and be proud of her earnings. Would love to hear your thoughts!
Laura, I love this comment so much! Thank you for sharing your experience working in an office where salaries are essentially transparent and there are salary bands. It's tough! Your insights are really helpful!
As for kids, oof, this is a good one that I haven't figured out, but plan to write about in the future! I haven't told my son how much I make, but like your kids, he's definitely curious!
Laura - I'm a government employee as well, and have had my salary public for many years. It does make for a weird scenario. When my now husband and I started dating, we both were public sector and knew what each other made (I made more) and it was just a weird undercurrent. I'm in the finance area of my organization, and in some ways it has wrecked havoc on our salary bands, cause you can see what the competition is paying at other agencies. It feels like an arms race, with no end in sight (which could be great for workers! But also we can't all keep up with that, as the government as a whole hasn't been treating it uniformly).
Kids - when I was in high school, my parents had me pay the bills for one month. It helped to see what electricity, the mortgage, a car payment, etc. cost. Doesn't help with the bigger question how much do you make. But it was an eye opener on where the money goes.
I did the same with my kids at one point. I made them sit down with the checkbook and bills and take care of everything -- I signed the checks but they did the rest. Of course, nobody pays bills with checkbooks now, but I still think it was worthwhile to do.
Another fantastic piece (with classic Lindsey comments throughout!). I do talk about finances with my husband, friends, and other loved ones. But, that's a more recent thing. Early in my career, I felt pressure to 'name a salary' and in doing so (without a ton of pay transparency around at that time), I undersold myself. I wish back then I'd had exposure to pay transparency so I could ensure I was paid a better, more fair rate. I'm so glad this topic is getting much more traction and we're keeping it going. Thanks, Lindsey!
Ugh, I hear you on the pressure to "name a salary" and the total lack of resources to understand how and what I should have been paid!
Thanks for the post. Aside from my manager/HR, only two people know how much I earn: my partner, and my financial advisor/tax preparer. And I'm not thrilled that my financial guy has that info, to be honest!
I'm all for employees having the right to share their salaries with each other, but I also think employees and employers in the private sector should have the right to keep that information private. I also think it's important to have different pay standards/philosophies for the private sector vs. public sector, and certainly for all the very different types of labor that exist.
In many professional occupations, performance/productivity is inevitably somewhat subjective, and at least for jobs involving managerial/"soft" skills, employers need to be able to apply subjective assessments and vary compensation accordingly, even within "peer" groups. People often think that fairness requires "equity", particularly where compensation is concerned. That's a valid view, but in many cases, not a particularly useful or realistic one, I don't think.
Thanks for sharing your perspective! And I appreciate you feeling weird about your financial guy knowing your salary info! :)
I agree with you that many professional occupations involve a lot of skills that are subjective and that makes salary bands difficult to implement. (The work of a manager can be so hard to define!) And there's plenty of examples of where policies rolled out in the name of "equity" end up working against women, because they work fewer hours b/c of caregiving responsibilities, take on different kinds of roles, etc.
But this is why I think this topic is so fascinating -- because there isn't an easy fix, and everyone has a different and valid opinion!
Only tangentially related, but I have to say that one of my greatest professional pleasures in a past life as a hiring manager for junior-level executives was when I was able to offer a starting salary that was higher than what the recruit had been expecting. Even twenty-somethings were often cynical enough to expect that any company would low-ball them if they got the chance, so there was nothing better than to hear someone say something like, "Well, I'm making $20K, but am really looking for $25K" (did I mention this was another lifetime?) and to be able to say "Well, we start at $27K!". :)
Yes! That is the best! And also, it's so nice of you for actually offering more. I've heard stories of companies going with the low-ball offer even if they had more in the budget.
Definitely made me feel good about the company!
An interesting piece Lindsey. I encourage your subscribers to get a good sense of the literature on gender differentials. Blau, Francine D., and Lawrence M. Kahn. 2017. "The Gender Wage Gap: Extent, Trends, and Explanations." Journal of Economic Literature, 55 (3): 789-865. DOI: 10.1257/jel.20160995
This was a great piece! Being open with my colleagues about my salary has led to raises at 2 of the 3 startups I’ve worked at (the 3rd was so small that I had no counterparts). Startups are notorious for paying very different salaries for people in similar roles because there’s no career leveling system set up yet. But yes it’s so hard to talk about salaries, I’ve usually waited until at least a few months into a job and I’ve gotten to know coworkers better outside of work before talking about it
This is an anomaly, but in the world of Manhattan co-ops, when you apply to the co-op board, you are required to divulge everything about your finances: salary, assets and liabilities, and tax returns for the past two years. And that's not just for co-ops that are stratospherically priced, but can be for relatively modest one bedrooms and studio apartments. It's ridiculous, but those are the rules.
Our first apt in Brooklyn was a coop, and it was crazy how much we had to share in the process! And then you know there are people in the building who know alllll your info!
I think it's fair for them to ask for that information: They're inviting you to be co-owners of the building. What gets me is that buyers go in knowing NOTHING about your co-owners' personal finances! I lived in a small 10-unit co-op years ago and it turned out that two of the units' owners were unemployed and then ended up in arrears on their maintenance, which caused a whole cascade of problems for all the owners, including the fact that banks would no longer lend to prospective buyers.
Oof Laura, that sucks!
That's an interesting point. It should show up in Board minutes.
We definitely need salary transparency! When I was growing up, my parents worked for a state university, so their salaries were public. That's how my mother found out she was making less than the men in her department and got her salary adjusted (in the 1970s). It's tough, though, because salaries are so inequitable. I used to make much more than many of my friends, when I worked in tech; now, as a clean-energy communications consultant, I make much less. We all work hard, but even in my friend group salaries are all over the place.
Why would you care? I will tell anyone who wants to know that the most I ever made was $40K per year, which I made as editor of a daily newspaper and also at an advertising agency. I make far less as a freelancer. It goes up and down a lot now.
Stop thinking your salary says anything about your worth. It doesn’t.
Great article, and such an important topic. Something which went unsaid is that federal law (the NLRA) protects all employees’ right to disclose their salary to one another voluntarily. It’s a different side of this issue than the newer laws that require employer disclosure of employee salaries. I think this is an important right that not enough people know about; maybe more people would be empowered to be transparent if they knew they could not legally suffer any repercussions from being transparent about how much they make.
Oh yes! THANK YOU! I kept meaning to include that in the piece and completely forgot!
And I've definitely had experiences (esp when I was the MD editor) where women have been told they aren't allowed to share their salaries, and we have to remind them of these protections.
I recently shared a detailed budget (on the messy therapist) of what it costs to operate a small private practice as a therapist. However, I left out what I save and what I net from this small business, that I in fact run all by myself. Something felt icky about sharing the exact number. I’m not sure if it came from worrying that I was making too much or that I wasn’t paying myself enough. Lots to think about here.
I also despise this "holiday" and greatly appreciated this piece. My current job at a non profit is the first time I've known my boss' salary in any job. I think being more transparent about salary bands and what employees make would be extremely helpful. As a hiring manager we give a 10k range and I always offer lower or in the middle but expect people to negotiate! We're very honest that we have pay bands so you have to dall within the listed range. It makes hiring easier tbh. As for family and friends it's been blowing my mind that my close girl friends won't even share their salaries! Even something as vague as "in the range of 100k" or "80ish". I try to model the transparency and get nothing in return
thanks for a a thoughtful piece Lindsey! I'm excited for the day when PepTalkHer is out of business thanks to the eventual closing of the pay gap once and for all! Also delighted to see the Peptalk worked and you have a paid tier now - folks are lucky to hear your thoughts weekly and excited to see the support you receive from the community :)
I am completely comfortable sharing my own salary info. I like to challenge people, honestly, because I make SO much less than people assume, and always have. My top salary ever was $40K, and I had to work around 60 hours per week to get it. I was laid off from that job (editor of a daily newspaper) years ago, and it turns out the job market is brutal for 50-ish former community newspaper editors, so I'm doing my own thing with Substack, Medium, books and freelance work. The only thing that keeps me from doing your challenge is my fear that my husband's employer might not welcome total transparency. For most of our marriage, I was the main breadwinner and now he is, but beyond that I probably should not share details. I will say that I recently had one month in which I did out-earn him, and we were both thrilled! He's my biggest cheerleader and truly believes I will someday make a decent amount of money as a writer. I doubt he's correct, but it's nice to be believed in.
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Salary transparency can be so tricky and that’s why it’s been taboo so long. But more sharing can help, especially for underrepresented groups. With more information, we can learn more about what is a fair market salary for roles and help close that pay gap.
Very interesting read. Thanks! Just a couple of thoughts I had while reading...
1.NFL football free agency is happening right now, and it is an industry where each player has a contract, and all of them are publicly disclosed. It appears to foster more competition among employers and allow players to have a starting point for negotiating their initial value to their company (team). There are the occasional public mentions of disgruntled players who feel they are underpaid because they outperformed their contact. Of course, they have salary caps, scales, and minimums, as well as limited physical durability that contribute to those feelings. So, it isn't apples-to-apples, but I thought worth a tangential mention.
2.I have never been happier than I am right now in my commission sales job. I feel like I have direct control of my pay, and can create my own best mix of personal quality time and grindstone work to get the best pay and least stress for my tolerances. In fact, that control has led me to turn down multiple "promotion" offers that would have me in salaried positions within my company at higher rates than my current earnings level. I am able to put my own value onto my personal time and factor it in as "income".
3. Regarding parenting, we have such varying styles and philosophies within multi-factor home dynamics that any advice needs to viewed through the unique situational lens. One thing I noticed is that as tired parents my wife and I tend to view chores that are more difficult for us or take more energy for us to perform as higher value chores. Personally, I always required my kids to do household operational chores like dishes, trash, and pet care as bartered requirements in exchange for room and board. Another requirement was to clean up your own messes as you go. I only paid cash for something beyond the scope of normal household chores, like helping me in the yard after a storm, spring cleaning, or irregular tasks. For those things I always offered an amount to my kids but encouraged them to negotiate if they felt like the job was worth more, either before doing it or immediately after to set the expectation for the next time. Of course, I was a single father for a few years and after remarrying, had 6 kids in the household. Both of these factors demand more contribution from the kids, and in retrospect, I believe has made them more responsible and more comfortable going after what their work is worth. This is not a catch-all application for every parent, by any means, but maybe a different perspective for someone to find useful. Growing up in an all-female household has shaped my parenting and my desire to get what I'm worth, too.
Thanks, Shaymus! I think these are interesting things to think about, especially the allowance thing!
You made a lot of great points here. For me, salary transparency is a non-negotiable. Transparency should be here. However, that doesn’t mean I need to know exactly how much the person sitting next to me makes!
I worked at a company that I think did the best at it — they shared salary ranges with employees before it was “cool.” You know if you were at the top of the range, middle, or bottom. You knew how much room you had to grow.
I think in a perfect world, anonymized salary data would be available to all employees, like something of a scatter graph. You’d be able to know where you stand in your peer group. Not only does this support equity goals for women and people of color, but it forces managers to be better at managing their team. If you’re at the bottom, they need to be able to tell you why. Is it your performance? You should know. Too many managers don’t address performance, or worse, don’t fairly tie performance to compensation. This addresses both.